"He was soaking wet, muddy from head to toe, and as we may have previously mentioned, very hammered.
Police pulled up as he was trying to kick his way through the door. They thought it might be good to arrest him. And that's when our pint-sized drunk decided to start threatening the cops.
He told them he was a 100-year-old vampire who would live forever. Then he threatened to kill one officer and his children, and claimed he could smell the cop's blood from the backseat of the cruiser.
When he was booked into jail, he was so unruly he had to be put in restraints. He threatened to eat the kidney of a female jailer. "